funishment, punishment? betterment! {SM191}

It is a wonderful discussion topic, the difference between punishment and funishment. Here is My experience with this. Some words of definition for the sake of understanding of how I will use the terminology in this discussion:

  • punishment = a set of (consensual) actions imposed by the Top by their will and at their discretion onto the bottom with the intent to DETER certain unwanted behavior/s or action/s by the bottom in the future
  • funishment = a set of (consensual) actions imposed by the Top by their will and at their discretion onto the bottom with the intent of mutual enjoyment on at least some level

the difference between punishment and funishment thus is the intent behind it, meaning what is the desired outcome. If it is – at the end of the day – just for fun, basically anything goes. even if parts of the funishment may be hard to take, the receiver will still be able to enjoy it in some ways. funishment, therefore, is not a suitable deterrent.

a devised punishment, where the bottom does not (care to) change their unwanted behaviors, or even worse, creates situations to get more of said attention is not a punishment by the definition above, but an involuntary funishment.

a punishment not only must have the intention but actually, the effect on the receiving bottom, to want to change their ill ways to better/wanted (by the Top) ways. unless and until that goal is reached, all punishment attempts are “play” or funishment.

in order a punishment to be effective, thus, the Top has to be interested and monitor the behavior after the punishment is executed and critically analyze, whether the devised means are reaching the desired outcomes, or need to be tweaked and adapted.

In My personal practice, I choose punishments from a wide array of areas. Neither do I use a “one size fits all” attempt, when it comes to what means I am using, nor about whom they are applied to. I understand, that each bottom is different, unique, and that something, that may work well with one person may completely not work with another. I understand, too, that even if something used to work once with someone, or even many times, it may not always work, and so I do monitor closely, if my objectives (that I do not fully share with the recipients) were reached, or not – and tweak My strategies with them accordingly.

I do not only know My impact/spanking implements, but also the power of a choice lecture, a scolding, a talk down, a pep talk, speech – and no, these are not synonyms necessarily. I know the use and futility of interviews and interrogations alike, though they are two pairs of shoes, too. I know the tools that I have invented or adapted, as well as those that others have used before Me – at least the wide repertoire I do use. I combine from different aspects and make sure that an effective punishment covers more than just one field, thus making chances for it to have the desired effect higher

I use non-verbal cues, rituals, and metaphors in actions as in words to create a more varied, more sophisticated, more complex, more complete, more holistic “plan of attack”, making it incredibly more difficult for the bottom to manipulate the outcome of the punishment to “their fancy”. Punishment time, as you can ask Mine, is therefor a time of stress, of undesirable sensations, mixed with a feeling of vulnerability/exposure and loss of (self-)control for them, enough to jump-start their will to implement changes they perceive as momentarily hard/undoable/difficult with a sense of urgency.

Because what matters in the end, is not the enjoyment of a jolly good time with funishment, nor to have implemented some kick-ass punishment, but that which solely matters to Me: their very betterment. #StrictMotivation Alternative Life Training #SMalt

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